Wednesday, February 27, 2013

New territory.

We all have different chapters in our lives. Our childhood, high school, college, first real job, first apartment, relationships, kids. They all shape and mold us and we take valuable lessons and memories from each of them as we leave one behind and move into the next. Today starts a whole new chapter for me.

I first met my future husband face to face on May 19th 2001 in Wayne, NJ. It was a day that I can remember every detail about, every nuance. I remember seeing him for the first time and the flood of nerves and excitement that coursed through me. I remember the feeling of finally hugging him and later, our first kiss. I remember exactly what I was wearing and how much I weighed. 

The day I met Michael I was 18 years old and weighed 270lbs. I wore a white t-shirt, black hoodie (with thumbholes I cut myself out of the cuffs WAAAAYYY before it was trendy, remember this was 2001) and I wore a pair of size 20, maroon BugGirl skater/punk/raver pants that I bought at Hot Topic. (Way before it went all mainstream and was so hardcore you were afraid to walk in let alone buy anything there.) I spent $50 on those pants with my Christmas money in 2001. I remember my mom was pissed at me for spending that much money on ONE pair of pants. I got a lot of use out of them though, I wore them all the rest of senior year and that fateful day in May. 

Fast forward to today. Today I stepped on the scale and it said 269.8lbs. 

This is a weight I've never seen in my adult life before. This is a weight that I've never been while knowing my husband, he has never known me at a time when I weighed this "little". This my friends, is new territory. The day we met I was a fresh out of high school, 270lb 18 year old. Today I am a 269lb, 29 year old loving wife and mother. So much has changed and there is still so much that I look forward to doing with Michael by my side. 

This year will be our 10th wedding anniversary, 12 years together. I may be older and heading down, but down in a good way! I'm on this journey to become healthier than I ever have been and I am winning that battle. Pound by pound I am achieving my goal and you know what.........

Yup. I kept the pants. Somehow after all the moves, the changes and the fact that they haven't fit me in 12 years, I have held onto these pants because that day, May 19th, 2001, they were magical. He made me feel like a princess that day and continues to do that everyday we are together. It seems silly to hold onto a pair of pants, but maybe deep down I knew this day would come. Maybe I knew that the smile and feeling I got when I put them on 12 years later would mean this much to me. Whatever the reason, I'm glad I did keep them, they are so much more than a pair of pants. They represented a beginning when I wore them back in 2001 and they represent a completely different beginning as I wore them again today in 2013.